The pagentry, the mystery, the excitement that is the State of the Union Address. Do I really care what President Bush has to say? No, not really, but it's still fun to watch. In fact, this year I created the Modified State of the Union Applause Scoring system.
The final score of the address:
46 full applause breaks
13 half applauses (12 from only the Republicans, and 1 from only the Democrats)
7 interruptive applauses
1 joke
1 wagging finger
Of course, the wagging finger was in response to the half applause from the Democrats which was actually one of the more entertaining parts of the show (I say "show" because the whole thing is so scripted it's hard to believe it doesn't have theme music).
That's probably about all the time that's worth devoting to this.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Friday, January 27, 2006
Iron Age Technology
At my desk are countless writing implements at my disposal. Several types of pens, in varying colors and styles; a variety of highlighters; permanent markers, in both fine nad broad tip; even mechanical pencils. But despite all the variety, I'm consistently drawn back to the simplicity of the solid #2 pencil. By all accounts, the other options are far superior, no need to sharpen, constant flow of ink, less smearage, bright colors, everything. Yet I still keep pencils around, and actually go through phases where I love writing with them. I don't know what it is. Perhaps it's the simplicity of it... the fine point of a freshly sharpened pencil... the convenience of the eraser when things go awry... or just the distinct feel and sound of the pencil graphite scribbling on the paper. Nothing else is quite like it.
Why does it matter? It doesn't. I just find it interesting that technology can't improve upon it. No doubt the rocket scientists at NASA still keep countless pencils around for the astronauts to use in space, because it's one thing that isn't affected by changes in gravity in the slightest. The only improvement that could be made would be a pencil that never needs sharpening... but still works and feels exactly like a normal graphite pencil. Perhaps someday our space age technology will figure that out... until then, I'll stay back in the iron age.
Why does it matter? It doesn't. I just find it interesting that technology can't improve upon it. No doubt the rocket scientists at NASA still keep countless pencils around for the astronauts to use in space, because it's one thing that isn't affected by changes in gravity in the slightest. The only improvement that could be made would be a pencil that never needs sharpening... but still works and feels exactly like a normal graphite pencil. Perhaps someday our space age technology will figure that out... until then, I'll stay back in the iron age.
Monday, January 23, 2006
The West Wing... dead after 7 seasons
As I was watching The West Wing last night on TV, I thought to myself, "this show will be cancelled at the end of this season". Lo and behold, it was announced that indeed The West Wing will end on May 14th with the inauguration of the new president, still to be determined.
Now I don't think I really became a dedicated watcher of the West Wing until its third season. Fortunately through the miracle of DVD, I've watched straight through the first 3 seasons to catch up on everything I never saw. Unfortunately, my DVD viewing habits are sketchy, and I still haven't completely finished the 3rd season shows... with the complete 4th and 5th seasons sitting on my shelf vastly untouched except to be removed from their Amazon.com packing box. Though I must say, they are excellent for long flights when you need to kill time with some quality DVD viewing. That's how I made it through so much of Season 3.
Why am I not surprised the show was cancelled? While I think the writing was not so good after Aaron Sorkin quit writing the show at the end of Season 4, it seems to have improved vastly this season, especially in the plots surrounding the election of the new president. Perhaps that's just because they found something to write about. But the show itself had one necessary flaw, a president can only serve 8 years... and once that's done, you're out of luck. Could the show survive with an almost completely new cast? Could ANY show survive with a completely new cast? Perhaps, but doubtful. The only way to stay true to a show that prides itself on keeping true to the reality of American politics, is for the show to end and the characters fade off into their post-White House lives where nobody even remembers their names.
Certainly it didn't help that NBC decided to move West Wing out of it's traditional 9pm Wednesday time slot for a cursed 8pm Sunday time slot. The last show I think I ever remember watching on Sunday at 8pm was Murder, She Wrote. It still baffles me why TV executives haven't figured out that moving shows out of their well-established time slots always signals the show's demise. Maybe they know this, and move them to help speed along the process.
Whatever the reasons, at least I'll have my 7-seasons of West Wing DVDs to watch whenever there are terrible new shows on TV that aren't worth watching.
In related television news, a few interesting lineup changes will be coming too:
For the past 14 seasons, Law and Order (the original, not SVU, CI, or the ill-fated Trial by Jury) has been in the Wednesday 10pm timeslot on NBC. But no more... NBC shakes things up by moving it an hour earlier to 9pm. I think this one will be able to survive the minor shift, but I'm no expert. It goes up against Mythbusters, which is the same problem I had when West Wing was on Wednesdays at 9, but fortunately I have a DVR now. Problem averted. :)
Las Vegas continues it's tour of the NBC schedule, after being moved from Sunday to Monday it makes its way down to the Friday night time slot. Might work, since there's nothing else good on Friday nights, but also who watches TV on a Friday night unless you want to see Dateline (which is moving to Saturday) or 20/20?
Las Vegas' move to Friday clears the way for that epic sensation Deal or No Deal to have a permanent spot on the Monday at 8pm timeslot followed by the Donald. I've said my thoughts on Deal or No Deal before... I give the show 10-weeks before it gets the axe and is buried in the gameshow graveyard along with the short-lived revived classic "21" with Maury Povich, and the Weakest Link (which was only entertaining to hear Anne Robinson verbally berating the contestants).
In the meantime, Food Network probably has plenty of episodes of Emeril Live, Good Eats, and Paula Deen stocked up to satisfy your TV viewing needs... with extra butter.
Now I don't think I really became a dedicated watcher of the West Wing until its third season. Fortunately through the miracle of DVD, I've watched straight through the first 3 seasons to catch up on everything I never saw. Unfortunately, my DVD viewing habits are sketchy, and I still haven't completely finished the 3rd season shows... with the complete 4th and 5th seasons sitting on my shelf vastly untouched except to be removed from their Amazon.com packing box. Though I must say, they are excellent for long flights when you need to kill time with some quality DVD viewing. That's how I made it through so much of Season 3.
Why am I not surprised the show was cancelled? While I think the writing was not so good after Aaron Sorkin quit writing the show at the end of Season 4, it seems to have improved vastly this season, especially in the plots surrounding the election of the new president. Perhaps that's just because they found something to write about. But the show itself had one necessary flaw, a president can only serve 8 years... and once that's done, you're out of luck. Could the show survive with an almost completely new cast? Could ANY show survive with a completely new cast? Perhaps, but doubtful. The only way to stay true to a show that prides itself on keeping true to the reality of American politics, is for the show to end and the characters fade off into their post-White House lives where nobody even remembers their names.
Certainly it didn't help that NBC decided to move West Wing out of it's traditional 9pm Wednesday time slot for a cursed 8pm Sunday time slot. The last show I think I ever remember watching on Sunday at 8pm was Murder, She Wrote. It still baffles me why TV executives haven't figured out that moving shows out of their well-established time slots always signals the show's demise. Maybe they know this, and move them to help speed along the process.
Whatever the reasons, at least I'll have my 7-seasons of West Wing DVDs to watch whenever there are terrible new shows on TV that aren't worth watching.
In related television news, a few interesting lineup changes will be coming too:
For the past 14 seasons, Law and Order (the original, not SVU, CI, or the ill-fated Trial by Jury) has been in the Wednesday 10pm timeslot on NBC. But no more... NBC shakes things up by moving it an hour earlier to 9pm. I think this one will be able to survive the minor shift, but I'm no expert. It goes up against Mythbusters, which is the same problem I had when West Wing was on Wednesdays at 9, but fortunately I have a DVR now. Problem averted. :)
Las Vegas continues it's tour of the NBC schedule, after being moved from Sunday to Monday it makes its way down to the Friday night time slot. Might work, since there's nothing else good on Friday nights, but also who watches TV on a Friday night unless you want to see Dateline (which is moving to Saturday) or 20/20?
Las Vegas' move to Friday clears the way for that epic sensation Deal or No Deal to have a permanent spot on the Monday at 8pm timeslot followed by the Donald. I've said my thoughts on Deal or No Deal before... I give the show 10-weeks before it gets the axe and is buried in the gameshow graveyard along with the short-lived revived classic "21" with Maury Povich, and the Weakest Link (which was only entertaining to hear Anne Robinson verbally berating the contestants).
In the meantime, Food Network probably has plenty of episodes of Emeril Live, Good Eats, and Paula Deen stocked up to satisfy your TV viewing needs... with extra butter.
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Things you'd never expect to see...
There are a few things you would never expect to see... one of those: the Seahawks going to the Super Bowl. Not only did they win, they beat Carolina hands down. What does this mean? One very important thing... this year I'll watch the Super Bowl for more than just the commercials.
As for my weekend... it was a busy curling weekend. We had a bonspiel (which for you who aren't hip to the lingo, a bonspiel is a curling tournament) with teams from the Evergreen Curling Club down in Portland. It was fun, but as a result over this past weekend I curled 6 games because I had my normal Friday and Sunday games, with 4 games for the bonspiel inbetween. Lots of fun, but equally tired now.
Now I have to go back to work tomorrow... but that's no surprise. Still doesn't mean I have to like it. :) I think every weekend should be a 3-day weekend... that's a better idea.
As for my weekend... it was a busy curling weekend. We had a bonspiel (which for you who aren't hip to the lingo, a bonspiel is a curling tournament) with teams from the Evergreen Curling Club down in Portland. It was fun, but as a result over this past weekend I curled 6 games because I had my normal Friday and Sunday games, with 4 games for the bonspiel inbetween. Lots of fun, but equally tired now.
Now I have to go back to work tomorrow... but that's no surprise. Still doesn't mean I have to like it. :) I think every weekend should be a 3-day weekend... that's a better idea.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Remember to honk... when you drive by Tom Shane
Few people in Seattle can watch television between the hours of midnight and 6am without encountering that shady auto insurance pitchman imploring you to "Remember to honk when you drive by Vern Fonk." Though I know of nobody who actually has purchased insurance from Vern Fonk, most everyone can clearly recognize and remember his obscure, bizarre, yet often entertaining and creative commercials.
Well move over Vern, there's a new resident moving in down the street. The illustrious jeweler whose trademark voice has graced Seattle radio airwaves for decades has made the leap to television with a new series of advertisements and a jingle that puts "Remember to honk..." to shame. Tom Shane, your self-proclaimed "friend in the diamond business," stars as a faceless version of himself in these creative, yet odd commercials for the Shane Co. jewelers. In past radio advertisements, the closest thing to a jingle was the distinctive slogan, address and store hours that concluded each spot. The crossover to television ads seems to have warranted an actual jingle that reinforces the quirkiness of the commercial: "He's dull. But he's brilliant." Short and to the point.
On the bright side, the commercials are highly entertaining. I guess I can't complain too much about that.
And in a brief addendum, a bit more research has shown that much to my surprise the Shane Co is actually not a local company. Despite the fact that they do a very good job of making it seem (at least to me) like Tom Shane is sitting in his Medina mansion extolling the virtues of the Shane Co, he's actually headquartered and originally based in Denver. He now owns over 20 stores nationwide from Washington to Georgia. Fascinating. Still funny commercials.
Well move over Vern, there's a new resident moving in down the street. The illustrious jeweler whose trademark voice has graced Seattle radio airwaves for decades has made the leap to television with a new series of advertisements and a jingle that puts "Remember to honk..." to shame. Tom Shane, your self-proclaimed "friend in the diamond business," stars as a faceless version of himself in these creative, yet odd commercials for the Shane Co. jewelers. In past radio advertisements, the closest thing to a jingle was the distinctive slogan, address and store hours that concluded each spot. The crossover to television ads seems to have warranted an actual jingle that reinforces the quirkiness of the commercial: "He's dull. But he's brilliant." Short and to the point.
On the bright side, the commercials are highly entertaining. I guess I can't complain too much about that.
And in a brief addendum, a bit more research has shown that much to my surprise the Shane Co is actually not a local company. Despite the fact that they do a very good job of making it seem (at least to me) like Tom Shane is sitting in his Medina mansion extolling the virtues of the Shane Co, he's actually headquartered and originally based in Denver. He now owns over 20 stores nationwide from Washington to Georgia. Fascinating. Still funny commercials.
Friday, January 13, 2006
Small annoyances
Isn't it ironic how sometimes the smallest things are the most annoying? I own a 2001 Nissan Altima, which is a great car. I've had the car for nearly 4 years, and have yet to require any major repairs of any sort on the car (I do have a broken power window on the passenger side, but I'll worry about that when the warm weather comes). However, there is one thing that I consider to be a fatal flaw in the design features of this car. There is NO sensor/light on the dash that tells you whether or not the trunk is open.
This seems rather small, I admit. But the trunk is also very well designed (or is it poorly designed?), such that if the trunk is unlatched, it still sits down as if it were closed. You actually have to pull up on the trunk to open it. It's very well balanced so it doesn't really have a preference of up or down. Convenient I guess.
The problem is, on multiple occasions, whether because I just forgot I had unlatched it, or because I had accidentally bumped the trunk release on my keychain, I've driven extended distances before I've noticed that the trunk is open. On several such occasions, I drove down I-5 at about 70mph for 30 miles or so, only to notice in the middle of the freeway that the trunk lid was bobbing up and down as I went over bumps in the road. At that point, it's not like I can do much about it, so I just keep going. But still, is it so much to ask that there be a little light that tells me the trunk is open... that would solve ALL of these problems.
Fortunately, I don't think I've ever lost anything out of the trunk as a result. It's a pretty deep trunk so stuff can't just slide out. At least I don't *think* I've lost anything. Wait, what about that million dollars I had sitting in my trunk last week? Maybe I should call my insurance company about that right away... hmmm.....
This seems rather small, I admit. But the trunk is also very well designed (or is it poorly designed?), such that if the trunk is unlatched, it still sits down as if it were closed. You actually have to pull up on the trunk to open it. It's very well balanced so it doesn't really have a preference of up or down. Convenient I guess.
The problem is, on multiple occasions, whether because I just forgot I had unlatched it, or because I had accidentally bumped the trunk release on my keychain, I've driven extended distances before I've noticed that the trunk is open. On several such occasions, I drove down I-5 at about 70mph for 30 miles or so, only to notice in the middle of the freeway that the trunk lid was bobbing up and down as I went over bumps in the road. At that point, it's not like I can do much about it, so I just keep going. But still, is it so much to ask that there be a little light that tells me the trunk is open... that would solve ALL of these problems.
Fortunately, I don't think I've ever lost anything out of the trunk as a result. It's a pretty deep trunk so stuff can't just slide out. At least I don't *think* I've lost anything. Wait, what about that million dollars I had sitting in my trunk last week? Maybe I should call my insurance company about that right away... hmmm.....
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
And the award goes to...
It's that time of year again... the time of year where we "honor" the best of the best (or the best of the worst) from the previous year. Last night was the People's Choice Awards, apparently the kickoff to the awards show season.
First a recap of last night's People's Choice Awards: ZZZzzzzzzzzzzz. What an action-empty, non entertaining show. Hosted by TV's Craig Ferguson, who I usually find quite funny, he was not at all funny on the show. I blame it on bad writing, but perhaps it's his own lack of humor. Plus, who shows an awards show on a Tuesday night? Isn't that just a blatant declaration that the show is not important enough to even bother to watch? Tuesday night is when you show made-for-TV movies that you don't expect anyone to watch, not award shows.
As far as "award season" goes though, there seems to be a lot of wasted bandwidth there. How many award shows are there that all give away awards for the same things? Obviously they're all given away by different groups of people, but does anyone really pay much attention to which organization is giving the awards away? Probably not. Most people would tell you that the Emmy's are for TV, the Oscars are for movies, the Grammys are for music, and the Tonys are for theatre. Beyond that everyone's mystified. The People's Choice awards are given to nearly all of the above (except theatre, obviously the people's opinion isn't worthy about the theatre). The Golden Globes? both movies and TV. Screen Actors Guild? Also movies and TV (but they actually only have 13 award categories which is nice.) The Emmy's are apparently so important that they break them into two pieces, one for daytime television and one for primetime television. Though I think only people who have no lives care about the daytime awards.
Actually, I think people care far less about the awards themselves, than they do about the celebrities and how they dress and who they're with and... well, it's just a big celebrity paparazzi event if you ask me. But for my own benefit to know which to avoid, or for your benefit if you need to mark your calendars, the major award shows of the year:
32nd Annual People's Choice Awards - Tuesday, January 10th
63rd Annual Golden Globes Awards - Monday, January 16th
12th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Sunday, January 29th
48th Annual Grammy Awards - Wednesday, February 8th
78th Annual Academy Awards - Sunday, March 5th
33rd Annual Daytime Emmy Awards - Friday, April 28th
60th Annual Tony Awards - Sunday, June 11th
58th Annual Emmy Awards - Sunday, August 27th
Now I'll go back to not caring again.
First a recap of last night's People's Choice Awards: ZZZzzzzzzzzzzz. What an action-empty, non entertaining show. Hosted by TV's Craig Ferguson, who I usually find quite funny, he was not at all funny on the show. I blame it on bad writing, but perhaps it's his own lack of humor. Plus, who shows an awards show on a Tuesday night? Isn't that just a blatant declaration that the show is not important enough to even bother to watch? Tuesday night is when you show made-for-TV movies that you don't expect anyone to watch, not award shows.
As far as "award season" goes though, there seems to be a lot of wasted bandwidth there. How many award shows are there that all give away awards for the same things? Obviously they're all given away by different groups of people, but does anyone really pay much attention to which organization is giving the awards away? Probably not. Most people would tell you that the Emmy's are for TV, the Oscars are for movies, the Grammys are for music, and the Tonys are for theatre. Beyond that everyone's mystified. The People's Choice awards are given to nearly all of the above (except theatre, obviously the people's opinion isn't worthy about the theatre). The Golden Globes? both movies and TV. Screen Actors Guild? Also movies and TV (but they actually only have 13 award categories which is nice.) The Emmy's are apparently so important that they break them into two pieces, one for daytime television and one for primetime television. Though I think only people who have no lives care about the daytime awards.
Actually, I think people care far less about the awards themselves, than they do about the celebrities and how they dress and who they're with and... well, it's just a big celebrity paparazzi event if you ask me. But for my own benefit to know which to avoid, or for your benefit if you need to mark your calendars, the major award shows of the year:
32nd Annual People's Choice Awards - Tuesday, January 10th
63rd Annual Golden Globes Awards - Monday, January 16th
12th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Sunday, January 29th
48th Annual Grammy Awards - Wednesday, February 8th
78th Annual Academy Awards - Sunday, March 5th
33rd Annual Daytime Emmy Awards - Friday, April 28th
60th Annual Tony Awards - Sunday, June 11th
58th Annual Emmy Awards - Sunday, August 27th
Now I'll go back to not caring again.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Happy New Year!
Well I haven't had much to blog about lately, nor have I had much time to blog lately. Must be the holidays, oh yeah, and work.
Today I must say it took me until after noon to realize it was the last day of the year. For some reason I hadn't associated tomorrow with being New Year's Day. But while we're on the topic... what kind of ridiculous holiday is this?! Somehow just because it's the first day of the year, every country in the world decided that it's a day worth celebrating. This is fine with me, but what about the first day of the month? February 1st, March 1st, September 1st... these should ALL be holidays! Oh well!
I guess today was a productive day of cleaning... so at least I can start the new year with a clean apartment.
I also watched this quality cinematic feature called Men with Brooms. As you might expect, this is probably the only movie ever made that revolves around the sport of curling. It's definitely a comedy, though don't look to see it among the ranks of any Academy Award winning films. First, it's more bizarre than it is funny. There is a lot of subtle curling humor, that you'd only understand if you are a curler, or fully versed in curling lingo and etiquette. As it was, it was nothing more than a fully predictable plot, filled in with a lot of other obscure garbage. Oh yeah, and since it's a Canadian comedy, it takes every opportunity possible to make fun of Americans and portray them as stupid, uptight, pompous, or some permutation thereof. The most famous actor in the film was probably Leslie Nielsen, which makes perfect sense considering he's Canadian and probably has made more terrible comedies than any man alive. (Though I think he is still hilarious, and enjoy even his terrible movies.)
Happy New Year!
Today I must say it took me until after noon to realize it was the last day of the year. For some reason I hadn't associated tomorrow with being New Year's Day. But while we're on the topic... what kind of ridiculous holiday is this?! Somehow just because it's the first day of the year, every country in the world decided that it's a day worth celebrating. This is fine with me, but what about the first day of the month? February 1st, March 1st, September 1st... these should ALL be holidays! Oh well!
I guess today was a productive day of cleaning... so at least I can start the new year with a clean apartment.
I also watched this quality cinematic feature called Men with Brooms. As you might expect, this is probably the only movie ever made that revolves around the sport of curling. It's definitely a comedy, though don't look to see it among the ranks of any Academy Award winning films. First, it's more bizarre than it is funny. There is a lot of subtle curling humor, that you'd only understand if you are a curler, or fully versed in curling lingo and etiquette. As it was, it was nothing more than a fully predictable plot, filled in with a lot of other obscure garbage. Oh yeah, and since it's a Canadian comedy, it takes every opportunity possible to make fun of Americans and portray them as stupid, uptight, pompous, or some permutation thereof. The most famous actor in the film was probably Leslie Nielsen, which makes perfect sense considering he's Canadian and probably has made more terrible comedies than any man alive. (Though I think he is still hilarious, and enjoy even his terrible movies.)
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 19, 2005
Deal... or No Deal?
Tonight began yet another primetime gameshow that we stole from the Brits. The show, Deal or No Deal, is being run as a primetime mini-series-type special that will run each night this week at 8pm on NBC. Reminds me of the original schedule of Who Wants to be a Millionare, before they started running it every night for a month, and then eventually even syndicated it, until people got so sick of it they run away.
I digress... so Deal or No Deal. The premise of this show is so ridiculously simple I feel like I'm sitting back in my STAT 394 class determining the probability and expected value of each decision. Once you filter out all the lights, glitz, and strategically placed commercial breaks, you're left with this:
1) There are 26 numbered briefcases, each containing a value from $.01 to $1,000,000.
2) The contestant selects one of the briefcases.
3) The contestant then selects the remaining briefcases one-by-one, which are opened to reveal the values contained within.
4) At various points throughout the process, the contestant is made an offer to sell the briefcase they selected for a specified amount of money. If they take the offer (Deal) the game is over, otherwise (No Deal) the game continues until they either take a Deal or all of the remaining cases are opened.
That's all there is to it. The fascinating part (to me at least) is how "The Bank" a.k.a. the man upstairs with a yellow legal pad who is supposedly making the offers, though I consider it far more likely that a computer is making all of the calculations, is actually coming up with his offers. Now, I didn't take too close of a look at the values being offered at various points, but I'm pretty sure they're just offering the expected value of their selected briefcase based on the values remaining. For example, when the contestant tonight was down to just 2 briefcases (their own, and one other) the two remaining values were $50,000 and $500. So what is the EV of the case she selected? (50000+500)/2 = 25250. And what was she offered? $25,000 even. Sounds about right to me.
How long is this going to last? My guess is probably, oh... about 5 episodes. :) Why? Because the show has several fatal flaws that are the curse of all bad gameshows:
1) The audience can't play along. Well, they CAN, but really, it's about as much fun as when your friend goes "I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 26". "Oooh... sorry, wrong."
2) B-list celebrity turned game show host. The host of this show is Howie Mandel. Name one thing he's done in the past 10 years... yeah, that's what I thought. Now the same might have been said about Regis when he first took on the role as host of Millionaire... but he proved himself nicely... it helps that people knew who he was and he's a likable enough guy. Howie reminds me of when they got John McEnroe to host that failed attempt at a game show called "The Chair" where people were answering trivia questions while strapped into a chair and they lost if their heart rate went up too much. Can we say ridiculous premise?
3) Lack of variety. After about 5 episodes of this, every episode will start to feel the same. It's not like they can change up the questions, or have new celebrity guests, or anything different. See reason #1... how many times can you play "I'm thinking of a number" before it gets old... oh yeah, maybe twice. 'Nuff said.
Now that I've devoted more time than this show deserves, I have a question... what's the deal with America stealing all of our gameshows from the British? Are we not creative enough to create our own incredibly ridiculous premises and pretend to give away exorbitant amounts of money, but in reality give away nothing more than the slimmest chance of winning anything substantial? I have one thing to say: No Deal.
I digress... so Deal or No Deal. The premise of this show is so ridiculously simple I feel like I'm sitting back in my STAT 394 class determining the probability and expected value of each decision. Once you filter out all the lights, glitz, and strategically placed commercial breaks, you're left with this:
1) There are 26 numbered briefcases, each containing a value from $.01 to $1,000,000.
2) The contestant selects one of the briefcases.
3) The contestant then selects the remaining briefcases one-by-one, which are opened to reveal the values contained within.
4) At various points throughout the process, the contestant is made an offer to sell the briefcase they selected for a specified amount of money. If they take the offer (Deal) the game is over, otherwise (No Deal) the game continues until they either take a Deal or all of the remaining cases are opened.
That's all there is to it. The fascinating part (to me at least) is how "The Bank" a.k.a. the man upstairs with a yellow legal pad who is supposedly making the offers, though I consider it far more likely that a computer is making all of the calculations, is actually coming up with his offers. Now, I didn't take too close of a look at the values being offered at various points, but I'm pretty sure they're just offering the expected value of their selected briefcase based on the values remaining. For example, when the contestant tonight was down to just 2 briefcases (their own, and one other) the two remaining values were $50,000 and $500. So what is the EV of the case she selected? (50000+500)/2 = 25250. And what was she offered? $25,000 even. Sounds about right to me.
How long is this going to last? My guess is probably, oh... about 5 episodes. :) Why? Because the show has several fatal flaws that are the curse of all bad gameshows:
1) The audience can't play along. Well, they CAN, but really, it's about as much fun as when your friend goes "I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 26". "Oooh... sorry, wrong."
2) B-list celebrity turned game show host. The host of this show is Howie Mandel. Name one thing he's done in the past 10 years... yeah, that's what I thought. Now the same might have been said about Regis when he first took on the role as host of Millionaire... but he proved himself nicely... it helps that people knew who he was and he's a likable enough guy. Howie reminds me of when they got John McEnroe to host that failed attempt at a game show called "The Chair" where people were answering trivia questions while strapped into a chair and they lost if their heart rate went up too much. Can we say ridiculous premise?
3) Lack of variety. After about 5 episodes of this, every episode will start to feel the same. It's not like they can change up the questions, or have new celebrity guests, or anything different. See reason #1... how many times can you play "I'm thinking of a number" before it gets old... oh yeah, maybe twice. 'Nuff said.
Now that I've devoted more time than this show deserves, I have a question... what's the deal with America stealing all of our gameshows from the British? Are we not creative enough to create our own incredibly ridiculous premises and pretend to give away exorbitant amounts of money, but in reality give away nothing more than the slimmest chance of winning anything substantial? I have one thing to say: No Deal.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
If you don't think this is cool...
... there's something wrong with you.
http://www.universeofsynergy.com/xmaslights.wmv
Q: How'd they do that?
A: http://www.wonderlandchristmas.com/wizardsofwinter.php
Now, if only I had:
1) a house
2) money to burn
3) creativity
I'd be all set. Well, 3's no problem, 2 might be able to work... but 1 is a sticking point. We'll see what we can do.
http://www.universeofsynergy.com/xmaslights.wmv
Q: How'd they do that?
A: http://www.wonderlandchristmas.com/wizardsofwinter.php
Now, if only I had:
1) a house
2) money to burn
3) creativity
I'd be all set. Well, 3's no problem, 2 might be able to work... but 1 is a sticking point. We'll see what we can do.
My name is Joe, and I endorse this product.
Celebrities and well-known people have been endorsing products since the beginning of television (or if you consider radio the precursor to television, long before the beginning of television). One thing I've always wondered though, why do celebrities do it? Admittedly, it probably depends on the celebrity, I mean your solid B-list celebrity probably genuinely could use the extra income it provides... so we'll forget about those. But pick someone rich enough that they shouldn't really need to do commercials for the money. In recent memory I recall Donald Trump hawking Domino's Pizza. Do I really believe that The Donald says to the wife "you know, let's order some pizza tonight" from his Manhattan penthouse, and even if he did want pizza, would he order that mass-produced cardboard that comes out of the Domino's ovens? Not in a million years. But surely he can't be needing the cash (though maybe to him, every dollar counts, so that measly $500,000 he gets from Domino's to act like a buffoon on national TV commercials is money in the bank)?
Enough about Trump, what about the new commercials for Campbell's Select soup with John Lithgow? Personally, I think the commercial where he breaks out into a spontaneous showtune about soup is absolutely hilarious. It's a great commercial, though I'd never buy the product. (Somehow I liken eating soup out of a box to drinking wine out of a box... just add "Mc" in front of the name.) Does John Lithgow need the money? Perhaps, though being the star of a top-rated sitcom for a few years (which is still in syndication somewhere, I'm sure) must leave a bit of cashola in the ol' pocketbook. Does he actually like the soup? Probably, but who doesn't like soup?
No, I think there is a commonality here that we have yet to explore. Celebrities are famous only as long as they remain in the minds of the public as a whole. What has Lithgow done since his sitcom? Can you name a single show he's been in? I can't, though I'm sure there are some. But what better way to get your face back on the screen and back into the viewers minds than by doing a cheesy TV commercial... one where everyone talks to their friends and goes "did you SEE that commercial with so-and-so... can you believe he did that?" It's perfect. Has anyone forgotten about Trump yet? No, probably not, but like him or not, he's a very smart man and knows business and how the public thinks. He probably thinks of his Domino's commercial solely in terms of keeping his name and face out there in the public. As long as he's still a star, people won't soon forget him, so it's time well invested (and he can buy a few pizzas with the chunk of change they gave him).
So by the same concept, as long as I keep blogging, people won't forget that I exist and people will keep reading. I'll be a Z-list celebrity yet!
Enough about Trump, what about the new commercials for Campbell's Select soup with John Lithgow? Personally, I think the commercial where he breaks out into a spontaneous showtune about soup is absolutely hilarious. It's a great commercial, though I'd never buy the product. (Somehow I liken eating soup out of a box to drinking wine out of a box... just add "Mc" in front of the name.) Does John Lithgow need the money? Perhaps, though being the star of a top-rated sitcom for a few years (which is still in syndication somewhere, I'm sure) must leave a bit of cashola in the ol' pocketbook. Does he actually like the soup? Probably, but who doesn't like soup?
No, I think there is a commonality here that we have yet to explore. Celebrities are famous only as long as they remain in the minds of the public as a whole. What has Lithgow done since his sitcom? Can you name a single show he's been in? I can't, though I'm sure there are some. But what better way to get your face back on the screen and back into the viewers minds than by doing a cheesy TV commercial... one where everyone talks to their friends and goes "did you SEE that commercial with so-and-so... can you believe he did that?" It's perfect. Has anyone forgotten about Trump yet? No, probably not, but like him or not, he's a very smart man and knows business and how the public thinks. He probably thinks of his Domino's commercial solely in terms of keeping his name and face out there in the public. As long as he's still a star, people won't soon forget him, so it's time well invested (and he can buy a few pizzas with the chunk of change they gave him).
So by the same concept, as long as I keep blogging, people won't forget that I exist and people will keep reading. I'll be a Z-list celebrity yet!
Thursday, December 08, 2005
Episode II: The Phantom Jury
Another day of jury duty, waiting to be called... the wheels of justice turn slowly apparently.
8:30am - I arrived and checked in, and took an obligatory seat in the jury assembly room. Today I got here plenty early, and got a nice table to work at over in the corner. Much easier than sitting with your laptop on your lap. It's decidedly more empty in here today, maybe removing those 40 folks from yesterday made a difference. As I count the number of people in the room I'm in... 37. There's probably slightly more in the other room, and a few more in the lobby. So yeah, I'd estimate at least 100 folks around here today waiting for their chance to serve (or more likely, sitting around hoping they're not called so they can go home for good at the end of the day).
9:15am - First announcement of the morning. 4 cases on the docket today with potential juries. Nothing as of yet, so more to come. I'll continue to sit here wasting time finding things to do online.
10:30am - Still nothing. We had an "official" jury break... but still no news. In one of the rooms they started a movie on the TVs, I guess it was good... I was already sitting in the "quiet" room and didn't feel like moving from my excellent seat. :)
11:15am - Finally some word. Of the 4 cases scheduled today, 3 of them have settled or otherwise been dismissed. That leaves only 1 jury remaining for the day, and we've got way too many people for that. So 50 people are selected to be excused with thanks for their service. My name is called, and I'm done.
And that was the story of my jury duty experience. I guess it wasn't a total waste of time... though it's hard not to think that when I spent two days doing nothing short of sitting around doing nothing. Oh well. At least I've served my time until next time.
8:30am - I arrived and checked in, and took an obligatory seat in the jury assembly room. Today I got here plenty early, and got a nice table to work at over in the corner. Much easier than sitting with your laptop on your lap. It's decidedly more empty in here today, maybe removing those 40 folks from yesterday made a difference. As I count the number of people in the room I'm in... 37. There's probably slightly more in the other room, and a few more in the lobby. So yeah, I'd estimate at least 100 folks around here today waiting for their chance to serve (or more likely, sitting around hoping they're not called so they can go home for good at the end of the day).
9:15am - First announcement of the morning. 4 cases on the docket today with potential juries. Nothing as of yet, so more to come. I'll continue to sit here wasting time finding things to do online.
10:30am - Still nothing. We had an "official" jury break... but still no news. In one of the rooms they started a movie on the TVs, I guess it was good... I was already sitting in the "quiet" room and didn't feel like moving from my excellent seat. :)
11:15am - Finally some word. Of the 4 cases scheduled today, 3 of them have settled or otherwise been dismissed. That leaves only 1 jury remaining for the day, and we've got way too many people for that. So 50 people are selected to be excused with thanks for their service. My name is called, and I'm done.
And that was the story of my jury duty experience. I guess it wasn't a total waste of time... though it's hard not to think that when I spent two days doing nothing short of sitting around doing nothing. Oh well. At least I've served my time until next time.
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Doing my part to uphold the Seventh Amendment
Is this what we have to go through to uphold the American right to a trial by jury? Perhaps so. I must say, they have gone to great lengths to make the process as painless and efficient as possible.
As one might have guessed, I'm sitting here in the Jury Assembly room of the King County Superior Court at the Regional Justice Center in Kent. Fortunately they have wifi internet connectivity here, which makes for a slightly more efficient way to pass the time. But in the interests of infotainment, here's a running commentary of today's events thus far:
8:00am - Arrive at the courthouse, make your way through the metal detectors at security, and check in with the nice people at the desk in the Jury Assembly room. Nice facility, I must say... and very efficient process. Just have to grab a clipboard and fill out my "Juror Biography" form (in triplicate, of course... gotta love bureaucracy) that basically asks your age, occupation, where you live, and various other classifying questions that would be provided to the lawyers should you be picked for a jury pool.
8:30am - I'd suspect about 150-200 potential jurors are gathered by now. One of the judges dropped by to welcome us all and give us an obviously scripted spiel about how important we are to the judicial process and such... though she obviously ad-libbed a lot of it too and added much more sincerity than a scripted list would do. This followed by a well-designed, yet incredibly cheesy "How to be a juror" video describing the activities. I felt like I was watching the pre-flight safety briefing video you see on some airplanes.
9:00am - Orientation complete... time to sit around and do nothing. We get the first announcement of the day, informing us that there are 4 potential jury trials on the docket today. Sit back, relax, and enjoy doing nothing.
9:30am - Update... 1 of the 4 potential trials will not be requiring a jury. Make that 3 potential jury trials remaining. I think it's a slow day at the RJC.
10:20am - After a brief 20 minute break to walk around and stretch our legs outside of the JA room, we receive the first jury impaneling of the morning. 15 names are called, and they all immediately leave for their mission. 2 potential juries remain.
11:00am - The 2 trials may still need juries, but definitely not before lunch. Since official lunch time is 12:00am-1:30pm, we may leave now and be back by 1:30pm. A nice 2 1/2 hour lunch break. I realized that I should have brought my laptop, and now with a 2.5 hour break, I drove back to my parents house in Federal Way, got my laptop and had some lunch... and then got back to the RJC at about 12:45 or so to sit and relax with the wifi connectivity.
1:30pm - Everyone's back from lunch, and time to call more jurors. This time they're going to impanel 40 jurors. (Based on this, we guess that it's probably a pretty big criminal trial they're dealing with.) I was not one of the 40 selected. Good news or bad news? We shall see. The 40 all turn in their juror bio forms and receive a number, and come back to relax some more while the counsel reviews their forms. Tick tick tick... 1 potential jury remains.
2:15pm - The 40-member jury panel receives word that the case has settled (I've watched enough Law and Order to piece this together... lots of legal bluffing from one side or the other... threatening to go to a jury, scared the defense enough to take a plea). As a result, those 40 people who did nothing but get assigned a number, are dismissed with the thanks of the court. They were technically on a jury even though they never actually left the jury room... so they don't have to come back tomorrow and they're done. Suddenly everyone's wishing they were one of the 40 selected. :)
2:30pm - With one potential jury remaining, and by my estimations well over 100 potential jurors in the room, it's quite clear that a lot of us will be returning tomorrow. But, at this point I have a minor celebrity-sighting. Who is one of the other potential jurors in the pool, none other than former Washington State Governor Mike Lowry! As my friend Jonell said, "That's a mug you can't miss!" True enough. Anyway, shortly after 2:30, we get the final announcement: the last trial has plenty of work to get through the rest of the day, and won't need a jury until tomorrow. So, we're all excused early, and will report again at 8:45am on Thursday. If we still aren't selected, that's the ballgame and we've served our time. Otherwise in the unfortunate event that I get selected for a jury, I could end up back again later the following week to continue on a trial. We'll see how things turn out. Time to go home!
As one might have guessed, I'm sitting here in the Jury Assembly room of the King County Superior Court at the Regional Justice Center in Kent. Fortunately they have wifi internet connectivity here, which makes for a slightly more efficient way to pass the time. But in the interests of infotainment, here's a running commentary of today's events thus far:
8:00am - Arrive at the courthouse, make your way through the metal detectors at security, and check in with the nice people at the desk in the Jury Assembly room. Nice facility, I must say... and very efficient process. Just have to grab a clipboard and fill out my "Juror Biography" form (in triplicate, of course... gotta love bureaucracy) that basically asks your age, occupation, where you live, and various other classifying questions that would be provided to the lawyers should you be picked for a jury pool.
8:30am - I'd suspect about 150-200 potential jurors are gathered by now. One of the judges dropped by to welcome us all and give us an obviously scripted spiel about how important we are to the judicial process and such... though she obviously ad-libbed a lot of it too and added much more sincerity than a scripted list would do. This followed by a well-designed, yet incredibly cheesy "How to be a juror" video describing the activities. I felt like I was watching the pre-flight safety briefing video you see on some airplanes.
9:00am - Orientation complete... time to sit around and do nothing. We get the first announcement of the day, informing us that there are 4 potential jury trials on the docket today. Sit back, relax, and enjoy doing nothing.
9:30am - Update... 1 of the 4 potential trials will not be requiring a jury. Make that 3 potential jury trials remaining. I think it's a slow day at the RJC.
10:20am - After a brief 20 minute break to walk around and stretch our legs outside of the JA room, we receive the first jury impaneling of the morning. 15 names are called, and they all immediately leave for their mission. 2 potential juries remain.
11:00am - The 2 trials may still need juries, but definitely not before lunch. Since official lunch time is 12:00am-1:30pm, we may leave now and be back by 1:30pm. A nice 2 1/2 hour lunch break. I realized that I should have brought my laptop, and now with a 2.5 hour break, I drove back to my parents house in Federal Way, got my laptop and had some lunch... and then got back to the RJC at about 12:45 or so to sit and relax with the wifi connectivity.
1:30pm - Everyone's back from lunch, and time to call more jurors. This time they're going to impanel 40 jurors. (Based on this, we guess that it's probably a pretty big criminal trial they're dealing with.) I was not one of the 40 selected. Good news or bad news? We shall see. The 40 all turn in their juror bio forms and receive a number, and come back to relax some more while the counsel reviews their forms. Tick tick tick... 1 potential jury remains.
2:15pm - The 40-member jury panel receives word that the case has settled (I've watched enough Law and Order to piece this together... lots of legal bluffing from one side or the other... threatening to go to a jury, scared the defense enough to take a plea). As a result, those 40 people who did nothing but get assigned a number, are dismissed with the thanks of the court. They were technically on a jury even though they never actually left the jury room... so they don't have to come back tomorrow and they're done. Suddenly everyone's wishing they were one of the 40 selected. :)
2:30pm - With one potential jury remaining, and by my estimations well over 100 potential jurors in the room, it's quite clear that a lot of us will be returning tomorrow. But, at this point I have a minor celebrity-sighting. Who is one of the other potential jurors in the pool, none other than former Washington State Governor Mike Lowry! As my friend Jonell said, "That's a mug you can't miss!" True enough. Anyway, shortly after 2:30, we get the final announcement: the last trial has plenty of work to get through the rest of the day, and won't need a jury until tomorrow. So, we're all excused early, and will report again at 8:45am on Thursday. If we still aren't selected, that's the ballgame and we've served our time. Otherwise in the unfortunate event that I get selected for a jury, I could end up back again later the following week to continue on a trial. We'll see how things turn out. Time to go home!
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
You have now entered... the twilight zone...
When worlds collide, we enter a dimension known only as... the twilight zone. In tonight's episode... two of my favorite things come together in an unexpected place. But more on that later. First, last night was the usual Monday night curling league, we had what I would call a supremely decent showing. We actually got lucky when it mattered, but all in all played very well. The line score follows:
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Total | |
| We | 1 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 2 | x | x | 8 |
| They | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | x | x | 0 |
Now for the obscure connection. Tonight I'm watching the Amazing Race, as usual, and nothing too odd happening. But then came the previews for the finale of the Amazing Race 8, where in my usual attempt to discern where the race will go next week I saw the greatest thing ever. They'll be CURLING on the Amazing Race next week! From the looks of it, it appears to be some sort of detour or roadblock, my guess is that they have to throw a rock and sweep it into the house, or perhaps something more complicated. It's great! Now I MUST watch next week!
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Why DVR is the greatest thing EVER!
Rarely do I like to praise anything that comes from those money-grubbing fools at Comcast, but despite the fact that I think they charge too much for the services they provide, I can't dispute the fact that they provide top-notch products. I think their high-speed internet is far superior to DSL, and their cable TV I can't argue much with either.
So yesterday, I upgraded my cable box to one of the new fandangled dual-tuner DVRs from Comcast. For those of you not in the know, a DVR is a "Digital Video Recorder". If you hear people talking about a Tivo, it's essentially the same thing. Tivo is a brand name, but they make DVRs. Of course, what can you DO with a DVR? I'm glad you asked!
In its simplest form, it works just like a VCR, except that instead of recording things on a VHS tape, it records it digitally on its internal hard drive. You can play the shows back whenever you want, fast forward, rewind, pause, basically everything you can do with a regular VCR. But that is where the similarities end.
The excitement begins with the fact that it's fully integrated with the on-screen TV guide. The advantage here is that all you have to do is find what you want to record in the TV guide, and press the record button on the remote, and you're set. It knows exactly when to record it, and won't forget. No chance of messing up the times or anything like that.
The excitement continues... say I want to record the same show whenever it's on. For example, I set it up to record The Price is Right every day. Now, if I get home from work and want to watch it, I can watch that morning's show whenever I want! And I can even set the option to only keep the most recent episode, so my DVR doesn't try to store weeks worth of shows, but only todays. It's... ehem... Comcastic?
The excitement builds... so since I'm too tired to stay up and watch David Letterman at 11:30 every night, I can just watch it the next day when I feel like it. But what's better? Since it's all pre-recorded, I can fastforward through all of the commercials. An hour long show is immediately cut down to something like 40 minutes or so. Plus who really wants to watch all of those commercials anyway.
The excitement never ends... it's more than just for watching pre-recorded stuff. You can also do lots of neat stuff with live television. Last night I was watching Law and Order and I got a phone call (during the most exciting part, of course), so I missed part of it. Then I remembered... I can actually PAUSE live TV. So I hit the pause button and the DVR and all is well... except that it took me about a minute to remember that I could pause it, so I missed some stuff. NOT A PROBLEM... I can also REWIND live TV because the DVR automatically saves the last 20-30 minutes of what you're watching, so it's easy to go back if you missed something. (I haven't tried this with say, a football game, but sounds like a pretty neat feature there!) No chance to miss anything.
So, why am I so thrilled? Why can't I live without this? I probably could... but wow is it a neat thing and now even when there's nothing on live TV, there's plenty of stuff I can watch pre-recorded. Is there a catch? Of course, it costs me more. But I was actually considering a Tivo before I realized how far superior the Comcast DVR is. Tivo costs $12.99 a month, PLUS you have to buy the Tivo box which is NOT fully-integrated with your digital cable. With the Comcast DVR, no up-front costs-- the box is provided-- and the monthly fee, only $9.95 a month on top of my current cable bill. BUT... this actually replaces the HDTV box that I'm already using, which was $6.50 more a month... so if you subtract that, add the other, you realize that it's only costing me $3.50 more a month! Well, that's what the original plan was. But there's one more catch there (leave it to Comcast to zap every bit of money out of your wallet)... you MUST subscribe to Digital Cable in order to get DVR. I was originally just using the basic cable package. So another upgrade to the Digital Classic base plan was an additional $10 more a month. The result... $13.50 more a month, but that also includes a whole bunch more channels (including my good friend the Game Show Network). Somehow that all worked out I'm paying $13.50 more and am perfectly happy with the result.
And believe it or not... despite the price that I still think is higher than it needs to be... it's still Comcastic. :)
So yesterday, I upgraded my cable box to one of the new fandangled dual-tuner DVRs from Comcast. For those of you not in the know, a DVR is a "Digital Video Recorder". If you hear people talking about a Tivo, it's essentially the same thing. Tivo is a brand name, but they make DVRs. Of course, what can you DO with a DVR? I'm glad you asked!
In its simplest form, it works just like a VCR, except that instead of recording things on a VHS tape, it records it digitally on its internal hard drive. You can play the shows back whenever you want, fast forward, rewind, pause, basically everything you can do with a regular VCR. But that is where the similarities end.
The excitement begins with the fact that it's fully integrated with the on-screen TV guide. The advantage here is that all you have to do is find what you want to record in the TV guide, and press the record button on the remote, and you're set. It knows exactly when to record it, and won't forget. No chance of messing up the times or anything like that.
The excitement continues... say I want to record the same show whenever it's on. For example, I set it up to record The Price is Right every day. Now, if I get home from work and want to watch it, I can watch that morning's show whenever I want! And I can even set the option to only keep the most recent episode, so my DVR doesn't try to store weeks worth of shows, but only todays. It's... ehem... Comcastic?
The excitement builds... so since I'm too tired to stay up and watch David Letterman at 11:30 every night, I can just watch it the next day when I feel like it. But what's better? Since it's all pre-recorded, I can fastforward through all of the commercials. An hour long show is immediately cut down to something like 40 minutes or so. Plus who really wants to watch all of those commercials anyway.
The excitement never ends... it's more than just for watching pre-recorded stuff. You can also do lots of neat stuff with live television. Last night I was watching Law and Order and I got a phone call (during the most exciting part, of course), so I missed part of it. Then I remembered... I can actually PAUSE live TV. So I hit the pause button and the DVR and all is well... except that it took me about a minute to remember that I could pause it, so I missed some stuff. NOT A PROBLEM... I can also REWIND live TV because the DVR automatically saves the last 20-30 minutes of what you're watching, so it's easy to go back if you missed something. (I haven't tried this with say, a football game, but sounds like a pretty neat feature there!) No chance to miss anything.
So, why am I so thrilled? Why can't I live without this? I probably could... but wow is it a neat thing and now even when there's nothing on live TV, there's plenty of stuff I can watch pre-recorded. Is there a catch? Of course, it costs me more. But I was actually considering a Tivo before I realized how far superior the Comcast DVR is. Tivo costs $12.99 a month, PLUS you have to buy the Tivo box which is NOT fully-integrated with your digital cable. With the Comcast DVR, no up-front costs-- the box is provided-- and the monthly fee, only $9.95 a month on top of my current cable bill. BUT... this actually replaces the HDTV box that I'm already using, which was $6.50 more a month... so if you subtract that, add the other, you realize that it's only costing me $3.50 more a month! Well, that's what the original plan was. But there's one more catch there (leave it to Comcast to zap every bit of money out of your wallet)... you MUST subscribe to Digital Cable in order to get DVR. I was originally just using the basic cable package. So another upgrade to the Digital Classic base plan was an additional $10 more a month. The result... $13.50 more a month, but that also includes a whole bunch more channels (including my good friend the Game Show Network). Somehow that all worked out I'm paying $13.50 more and am perfectly happy with the result.
And believe it or not... despite the price that I still think is higher than it needs to be... it's still Comcastic. :)
Sunday, November 20, 2005
All that work for a $10 lightbulb
What ever happened to do-it-yourself car repairs. Sometimes I swear that manufacturers intentionally design cars just so that it's next to impossible to make simple repairs yourself. Now, I'm not trying to replace the engine, or anything like that... I'm not crazy. I just found last night that one of my headlights was out, so logically, this morning I go to the auto parts store up the street and pick up a replacement bulb. I figured, pop the old one out, put the new one in, piece of cake, right? WRONG. A job that I expected would take no more than 10 minutes ended up taking over an hour.
So I pop the hood, use my trusty maglight to scope around for an easy way to replace it. I can see exactly where the bulb connects to the car, the problem is you basically need hands of a 6-year-old to even reach down in there, plus once you do, there's not enough clearance to get the bulb out anyway, because the battery is in the way.
Plan B: Remove the battery. Easy, right? Sure, just disconnect the battery terminals, and loosen the one bolt that holds the battery down, and it just pops right out. Battery terminals... considering I've never replaced the battery the nuts that hold the terminals on were a little tight and awkward, but I managed to get them off with reasonably little trouble. Then that big bolt way down at the bottom that holds the battery on... not such an easy story. I can get a ratchet down there and it just fits in perfectly. One problem... there's no space to TURN the ratchet. Minor details.
It's at this point I second guess myself just wondering if there's an easier way then taking the battery out. So, after messing with my own intuitional instruction manual, I opened up the glove box and found the owners manual and flipped to the page on replacing head lamps. (At least they still put the instructions for this in the manual.) I call it "How to replace the headlamp in 9 easy steps." The first 6 steps involve removing about half a dozen screws, nuts, and bolts and basically disassembling the front corner panel of the car, followed by 3 quick and easy steps to disconnect the bulb and replace it. The additional caveat, "based on the complexity of the procedure, we recommend taking your vehicle in to an authorized service center for replacement." Taking the car into the dealer to replace the headlight? I think not. Removing half the front end of the car just to replace the headlight? I also think not.
I now return to the original plan of removing the battery, this time with a bit more resolve than the last time. Using a creative combination of the ratchet, vise-grips, and crescent wrenches, I managed to get the bolt holding the battery on loosened. From this point forward things become decidedly easier. I removed the battery, which gave me a wide-open reach at the back of the headlight. A few twists and disconnections and the bulb came right out. The new one went in equally easy. Of course, since the battery was now sitting on the floor of the garage, I had no way of knowing whether or not the new bulb was installed correctly and working, but I had hope.
I replaced the battery, reconnected everything and screwed everything back in (albeit this time, not nearly as tightly as it was in previously, because inevitably next week my battery will die or something). Turned on the headlights and it worked beautifully. The only lasting side-effects: my radio presets were all reset, but I'd been meaning to change them around anyway, so it worked out well. All in all, everything's fine but it was incredibly too much work for such a simple task to replace a $10 lightbulb.
So I pop the hood, use my trusty maglight to scope around for an easy way to replace it. I can see exactly where the bulb connects to the car, the problem is you basically need hands of a 6-year-old to even reach down in there, plus once you do, there's not enough clearance to get the bulb out anyway, because the battery is in the way.
Plan B: Remove the battery. Easy, right? Sure, just disconnect the battery terminals, and loosen the one bolt that holds the battery down, and it just pops right out. Battery terminals... considering I've never replaced the battery the nuts that hold the terminals on were a little tight and awkward, but I managed to get them off with reasonably little trouble. Then that big bolt way down at the bottom that holds the battery on... not such an easy story. I can get a ratchet down there and it just fits in perfectly. One problem... there's no space to TURN the ratchet. Minor details.
It's at this point I second guess myself just wondering if there's an easier way then taking the battery out. So, after messing with my own intuitional instruction manual, I opened up the glove box and found the owners manual and flipped to the page on replacing head lamps. (At least they still put the instructions for this in the manual.) I call it "How to replace the headlamp in 9 easy steps." The first 6 steps involve removing about half a dozen screws, nuts, and bolts and basically disassembling the front corner panel of the car, followed by 3 quick and easy steps to disconnect the bulb and replace it. The additional caveat, "based on the complexity of the procedure, we recommend taking your vehicle in to an authorized service center for replacement." Taking the car into the dealer to replace the headlight? I think not. Removing half the front end of the car just to replace the headlight? I also think not.
I now return to the original plan of removing the battery, this time with a bit more resolve than the last time. Using a creative combination of the ratchet, vise-grips, and crescent wrenches, I managed to get the bolt holding the battery on loosened. From this point forward things become decidedly easier. I removed the battery, which gave me a wide-open reach at the back of the headlight. A few twists and disconnections and the bulb came right out. The new one went in equally easy. Of course, since the battery was now sitting on the floor of the garage, I had no way of knowing whether or not the new bulb was installed correctly and working, but I had hope.
I replaced the battery, reconnected everything and screwed everything back in (albeit this time, not nearly as tightly as it was in previously, because inevitably next week my battery will die or something). Turned on the headlights and it worked beautifully. The only lasting side-effects: my radio presets were all reset, but I'd been meaning to change them around anyway, so it worked out well. All in all, everything's fine but it was incredibly too much work for such a simple task to replace a $10 lightbulb.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Curling updates
Well, curling is still keeping me busy these days. Monday night curling went, I wouldn't say "well", but by the right combination of luck and decent shots we managed to win. As you might tell from the line score:
Things were looking bleak after 3 ends, but somehow we managed to turn things around at just the right time to make it work. In related news, as is part of the Monday night league, each week 2 teams bring food for everyone, and this was our team's week to bring food... or so we thought. There was a shuffle of the schedule a few weeks back, at which we thought we got moved from last week to this week, so we brought food this week. Unfortunately, everyone else seems to think we were supposed to bring food last week, so confusion abounded. Either way, there was plenty of food this week and everyone was happy. :)
And in other news, in our Sunday novice league, we had a mini open house... basically a "bring your friends curling" day, and I convinced Jonell and Chris to come. They both ended up having a good time... after they discovered the miracle of slip-on grippers to go over their shoes. Being a med school resident, Chris has no consistent schedule, so a weekly event like curling doesn't mesh well. But Jonell has decided to join the novice league this year, and will be out curling with us next week. How exciting!
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Total | |
| We | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 5 |
| They | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 |
Things were looking bleak after 3 ends, but somehow we managed to turn things around at just the right time to make it work. In related news, as is part of the Monday night league, each week 2 teams bring food for everyone, and this was our team's week to bring food... or so we thought. There was a shuffle of the schedule a few weeks back, at which we thought we got moved from last week to this week, so we brought food this week. Unfortunately, everyone else seems to think we were supposed to bring food last week, so confusion abounded. Either way, there was plenty of food this week and everyone was happy. :)
And in other news, in our Sunday novice league, we had a mini open house... basically a "bring your friends curling" day, and I convinced Jonell and Chris to come. They both ended up having a good time... after they discovered the miracle of slip-on grippers to go over their shoes. Being a med school resident, Chris has no consistent schedule, so a weekly event like curling doesn't mesh well. But Jonell has decided to join the novice league this year, and will be out curling with us next week. How exciting!
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Do they think people won't notice?
Have you noticed that commercials take certain "artistic liberties" when promoting their products and services? This has probably been done since the dawn of television, but it makes it look so fake and unbelievable. Now, I accept the "best case scenario" advertising, like you see in the fast food commercials. You see the Burger King commercials for a Whopper... have you EVER ordered a Whopper that looks like that? Of course not... mine has usually been squished and flattened, with no strategically-placed beads of ketchup and mustard glistening out of either side of the crisp red tomato. But theoretically, on a particularly lucky day, it might look something like that... the commercial is simply what you might get in the best case scenario. This doesn't really bother me.
What I'm taking about are things that are completely changed for the purpose of the commercial. Take credit card commercials for example. It's so common these days to demonstrate the "convenience" of using credit / debit cards to make purchases. Their favorite way of showing this to show the customer swiping their card at the terminal when checking out. Of course, they take certain care to hold the card so you can see the Visa logo (or Discover, or whatever, they all do it) while they're swiping the card. Freeze the camera. Go pull a credit card out of your wallet... go ahead, I'll wait...
...
...
OK, good. Now tell me, what's wrong with this picture?:
What I'm taking about are things that are completely changed for the purpose of the commercial. Take credit card commercials for example. It's so common these days to demonstrate the "convenience" of using credit / debit cards to make purchases. Their favorite way of showing this to show the customer swiping their card at the terminal when checking out. Of course, they take certain care to hold the card so you can see the Visa logo (or Discover, or whatever, they all do it) while they're swiping the card. Freeze the camera. Go pull a credit card out of your wallet... go ahead, I'll wait...
...
...
OK, good. Now tell me, what's wrong with this picture?:
I'm all about product placement, but tell me exactly how productive this transaction is going to be, considering the magnetic stripe on the card isn't even going through the machine. Plus, if you've ever had a senile moment and tried to swipe your card this way, you'll quickly notice how it doesn't slide particularly well when you're running over the raised numbers! Every time I see this, it drives me crazy. Think of how many people mimic what they see in the commercials, and then feel stupid because it doesn't work. Maybe they should sue Visa for emotional distress caused by their deceptive advertising? No no no, that would be a frivolous lawsuit... and that's a blog for another day.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Election updates...
Watching the election results come in can be a satisfying experience... well, when you're in the apparent majority. As a follow-up to my Initiatives blog from a few weeks back, apparently the majority of the state had mostly the same sentiments I do. What we have learned tonight:
- Nearly 2/3 of Washington citizens don't like smoke, at that's something all 39 counties can agree on. In 30 days, look forward to enjoying smoke-free bars, casinos, and bowling alleys.
- Confusing initiatives about healthcare and malpractice reform don't win enough votes
- As much as people hate gas taxes, they hate our current roads more
- 57% of Washingtonians still listen to the trash that comes out of Tim Eyman's mouth, but ironically, most of the rural counties in the state have him figured out. I'm not quite sure what to make of that.
- Seattleites are fed up with the monorail, and will be glad to stop hearing about it for good.
I guess I don't have much to complain about, believe it or not. The people have spoken.
And in a last-minute reminder and plug for my other blog, the Amazing Race 8 Travelblog had a special guest columnist this week, so be sure to check it out!
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
And the Oscar for best movie reviews goes to...
In what I will officially credit as the find of the year, my friend Andrew stumbled onto a biweekly online video segment on Movies.com that features everyone's favorite heckling Muppets, Statler and Waldorf, live From the Balcony with reviews (or rather, what seems to be more of a cynical view) of recent and upcoming movies. Each segment is about 10 minutes or so in length, and 99.9% hilarious. The current episode is actually the 10th in the series, but fortunately for those of us a little late on the uptake, they have the entire archive of past episodes available for viewing. And the best part: it's absolutely free! It can't be beat!
Each episode features clips from trailers, special features starring other members of the Muppets crew including Pepe the King Prawn, as well as the weekly "Balcon-ism". This is high-quality entertainment, so much so that it merits being immortalized on my featured links segment right here in the Universe of Synergy! Now if you'll excuse me, I have more reviews to watch.
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