Monday, August 01, 2005

Just when you think you've seen everything...

Just when you think you've seen everything there is to see on television, you flip past FSN and what do you see? The 2005 World Series of... Darts. Yes, you heard right... darts.

Now, I shouldn't be surprised, considering I've seen everything from Scrabble tournaments, to, well, the X-Games on ESPN... and anyone who knows me knows I can't watch enough curling on TV during the winter months (thank goodness for Canadian television, eh?). But seriously, I don't think I've seen anything quite as odd and disturbing as watching tournament darts. First, it obviously is being taped in a bar somewhere in Vegas. But nothing upscale about anything, looks pretty plain and ordinary. The people are sitting at long tables, and it's not like typical sports where everyone's glued to the action... in fact, most of the people here look like they couldn't care less about it. People continue on with their conversations... the bouncer obviously removed those officials from the golf course with their big "QUIET PLEASE!" signs. "Please, talk amongst yourselves."

But I think the most disturbing part is the announcer. First, he's standing not more than 2 feet directly to the side of the dart board. And I ain't talking about any of those plastic-tipped 'el cheapo' darts... we're talking sharp, pointy, pierce-your-skull type metal darts. Good thing these guys are the best darts players in the world, otherwise I might be a bit worried. Second, his voice sounds like that voiceover guy you hear on the commercials for the monster truck rallies at the Tacoma Dome (of course, where else?)... "SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY!"... but with a British accent. Go ahead and try to talk like that right now... I'll wait... ...

... done yet? Good... yeah... that's what it sounds like. Very creepy.

OK, now that I've been watching this for way too long, I'll go ahead and find something else on. Let's see... The Sixth Sense? Naww. Fear Factor? I think not. West Wing reruns on Bravo? Who can beat that!? Anything's gotta beat darts.

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